Research Project

I am currently analyzing online spaces dedicated to issues of autism spectrum disorders. I am also including spaced created by and/or for individuals with ASDs.

This is a funded project, sponsored by my university, to help determine how we might design online courses to better accommodate students with special needs. It is a tedious process, but one that should pay dividends over the coming years as more students with diagnoses of HFA, AS, and PDD-NOS qualify for university admissions.

Though there are a great many sites dedicated to autism, the thing I still notice most is the "tribal" nature of the spaces. There are clear divisions within this small universe of individuals with ASDs, families, advocates, researchers, and so on. The tone of many sites is aggressive -- not at all inviting. I do understand how this has come to pass, but it is a shame.

Anyway, I'm concentrating more on design issues and accessibility than the rhetorical methods employed. At least design is my focus for now. Later, much later, I'll delve into the rhetorical analysis of autism communities.

(Or I'll opt for an entirely more peaceful pursuit and watch birds at the local parks.)

Another Medical Moment

Monday I have yet another (not so exciting) medical procedure. Yet, it isn't the medical procedure I am about to have that annoys me. No, what is annoying me are my eyes.

While I'm about to have some internal issues checked and verified, it is the pain of my eyes that distracts me each morning. I have strange, curling eyelashes over my left eye which keep getting lodged under the eyelids. I then have to flush the eye with sterile cleaner. My right eye just hurts. A lot. it is the familiar pain of the "erosions" I have had for the last year or so. The eye tears, as in rips, not drips, causing excruciating pain and sensitivity to light.

I'm already "hypersensitive" to the world around me. Having my eyes hurt like they have been makes sunlight unbearable. Even though internal issues can be serious, there are few things that hurt as much as a scraping sensation in your eyes.

In general, I see doctors too often. As a result, I'm not exactly ready to call the eye surgeon to have the obvious said. The erosions are just painful. There's not much else to do but let them heal and have my vision checked annually. Oddly enough, I see with near 20/20 vision. Ironic, since the eyes hurt so much.

Movie Night

Movies are a challenge for me.

I can't even recall the last movie I saw before tonight. It was something in California -- either an X-Men movie or Star Wars, Episode I. (Neither would be my choice. I like cartoons and romantic comedies, usually.)

But, I am in Davis, CA, alone, and wanted to do something tonight. Even though it was $11.50 (plus $4 for snacks), I decided to try Up!

There is a lot to be said for going to a movie in a college town, in the theatre closest to campus. No children. No cell phones. Actually... almost no people on a Friday night showing in June.

It was great. The movie was touching, emotional... and nothing like watching on a television. Because of the price, I doubt I would do this often. But, I'm glad I did. I had forgotten how huge the screens are.

Anyway, it turns out that I can go to a movie -- when almost no one else is in the theater.

Wish one person had been with me. The start of Up! would have been nice to share in a theater with her. It was very touching.

Angry Activism - Not Me...

I appreciate the power of passion -- but I also recognize its limits.

I can seem passionate about a few things, but the general reality is that being "excited" and "enthusiastic" is not the same as being passionate. I'm interested in the language arts, visual design, and technology. But, my passion is not the passion of a missionary out to change the world. I might be opinionated, but that's not uncommon among artists.

Reading blogs and columns by "autism advocates" sometimes leaves me uneasy. Their passion is angry, an unsettling bitterness pervades some of the writing. Even when I agree with a general claim or viewpoint, I find myself wishing the arguments were made in a more moderate tone.

Maybe it is because I think everyone faces some challenges. I don't see any obstacles I face as particularly horrible. Insensitive, rude people bother me, but that's life.

Because I realize there are costs to accommodation, treatments, and education, I don't demand or even expect an ideal world. Good enough is okay.

With governments, organizations, and businesses struggling financially, the best approach to activism seems to be one of compromise. What can be done, with limited resources, without pitting one group of people against another? We don't need various groups battling each other.

Unfortunately, group versus group is part of democratic debate, I suppose. Compromise takes time and effort, and is unlikely with limited resources. I don't think any cause of importance to me is necessarily more important than other causes.

Should I be upset by people using the word "disabled?" I'm not. My body has some deficiencies. My right arm is "disabled" -- it certainly isn't "able" and neither is my curved spine. Who doesn't have a few disabilities? Imperfect eyes, diminished hearing... we all become "disabled" over time, anyway.

I'm not upset by the phrase "atypical neurology." I'm not typical, and that's the way it is. Personally, I consider being "gifted" as socially disabling as having "characteristics of high-functioning autism." I'm odd. That's me. The people who aren't odd are the oddities... technically.

I just don't get angry or defensive about being a tad bent and different.

Sure, I hate to read about abuses of disabled children. I dislike stories of people being cruel. But, I think any abuse is abuse -- period.

Yes, I actually thing there are "degrees" of disability. People in wheelchairs need more access than I do. The blind need more assistance than I do.

I'm not angry about my life. It's okay. I've met jerks -- but they are likely jerks to everyone. Taking the jerks too personally would simply leave me bitter and vindictive, like many of the articles I have read lately.