The Autistic Me

I have reworked the introduction to the section in A Spectrum of Relationships dealing with peers and colleagues. I hope this introduction is better. I'm not going to repost the entire chapter at this time, only the introduction. Colleagues and Peers For some people with autism spectrum disorders, colleagues and peers are the closest non-familial relationships in their lives. Autistic individuals with occupational or academic success often find their success because of an ability to hyper-focus on a topic or skill of special interest. This focus is one aspect of “autistic perseveration,” a near-obsessive interest in an object, concept, topic, or activity. The reason I chose to discuss peers and colleagues in the same section is simple: workplaces aren’t that different from school — especially high school. Schools and businesses are social settings and our peers and colleagues cannot help but form opinions of us. Because they come into constant contact with us, our peers and collea...

More of the draft text I am composing. As always, comments are appreciated. Colleagues and Peers For some people with autism spectrum disorders, colleagues and peers are the closest non-familial relationships in their lives. Autistic individuals with occupational or academic success often find their success because of an ability to hyper-focus on a topic or skill of special interest. This focus is one aspect of “autistic perseveration,” a near-obsessive interest in an object, concept, topic, or activity.  I’ve read various definitions of “colleague” and “peer,” so it might be useful to clarify the terms as I am using them in this text. I use “colleague” as a broad synonym for coworker. When I use “peer” I am referring to someone of similar age and background as the subject. As a university instructor, all the employees of the university were my colleagues and deserving of respect. However, my “peers” at the university were the doctoral students and the junior members of the facult...

A random, rambling set of thoughts. I cannot sleep (it is 3 a.m.) and have been thinking too much. I am usually able to communicate, but not always. I am usually able to walk and move about, but not always. I have stereotypical movements at times, including pounding my hands against my body -- though I don't always remember for how long, why, or what ended it. I have been diagnosed retarded and gifted, dependent on when and how I was evaluated. What I know is that I am fortunate because I am not always "low-functioning" and am, generally speaking, now able to anticipate those stressors that cause regression and meltdowns. I'm not always able to prevent lost days or weeks, but I usually can. So, can I speak for only one group? No group? I have no idea and don't make any claim to universal understanding of the "autistic" experience. I hope my experiences make me somewhat "empathetic" towards those less fortunate, those who will not be able to att...

I will be hosting a presentation and discussion on autism and relationships during the Arc Midstate Annual Conference. The description is: Autism and Developing Interpersonal Relationships - This can be a challenge for students and adults with autism spectrum disorders. This frank discussion explores the positive and negative experiences shared by most people, but with an emphasis on how autism is an additional obstacle to relationships. How can family, friends, caregivers, and educators help nurture the skills necessary for rewarded social connections? What are the challenges faced by individuals with ASDs and how can specific challenges be addressed? Remember, I am talking to parents and educators with the potential for some teens in the audience. My comments are addressed to the parents, but they are meant for everyone. Portrayals of people with ASDs range from the anti-social hermit to the oblivious stalker. The reality is more complex. Some people are social, some are not. We ...

The following deals with an issue as delicately as possible: Has the recent Tucson shooting increased the likelihood that students with autism spectrum diagnoses might be mistaken for safety risks? At first, I was taken aback by the issue. Then, I realized it isn't new. Students with ASDs already have to battle misunderstandings and cultural biases. Several college and university students with ASDs write to me on a regular basis. I do my best to answer their questions, but I don't always have good answers. Sometimes, I can help or at least offer a little guidance towards where the right answer might be. Then there are the answers that leave me depressed. I'm going to paraphrase a question from a student, as best I can while still conveying his concerns. I have promised to do my best not to reveal much about the student. However, he's actually one of many with these experiences. I am a master's student. My adviser recently told me that other students are uncom...

Even as an adult in my mid-30s, I am struggling as a graduate student. I can do the work, I can read the texts, but I am struggling. What is the issue? Probably the most important of all: In eight months I have yet to form a single personal connection within my doctoral program. My social anxiety is too high to attend gatherings. I keep thinking I'm going to attend an event, but I have only managed to attend a play -- nothing else outside of classes. I fear going to campus, much of the time. It takes a lot of energy to attend class. Sadly, I sit and shake in my classes, even though I don't hesitate to speak. Classmates have called me "The Ghost" to my face. I'm an outsider. The importance of connections cannot be overstated. You need to connect with classmates and with instructors. I would tell any student that you need a mentor in a degree program. Without a mentor and a clear goal, you will struggle -- as I am doing now. A mentor helps you nav...

Probably the most difficult decision anyone with a developmental disorder can make is who to tell and how. I certainly do not have a good answer for either question, since I resist the labels experts have offered. There are benefits to disclosure, based on the experiences of others. First, you have "official" recognition, which includes various protections legally. If I have a problem related to my physical limitations, it helps to have some legal basis when seeking corrective measures. Second, the reality in my field (education) is that a disability can be an asset, increasing your value to a university. The obvious negatives to disclosure relate to the biases and even fears people have regarding neurological conditions. Most of us know that a palsy is not contagious. Tremors do not spread from me to my students or classmates. My long list of behavioral glitches are also not going to spread throughout the classroom. Yet there are those who cannot deal with difference. ...