The Autistic Me

Newspaper (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) When I was an undergraduate, my goal was to teach high school photography , yearbook, and newspaper . If I could undo the last 27 years of my career... I would. In a heartbeat. Accepting a job that seemed right changed my life and took me away from that path. Instead, I ended up trying to make my skills work, somehow, from job to job. But, I always long to be back at the high school, teaching photography and media arts . The disappointment in myself doesn't fade. I should have made that lousy (abusive) job work long enough to clear my credential and do what I wanted. So, I went after the MA , Ph.D, and MFA all with the goal of teaching full-time. I've had one full-time, tenure-track post, and it was as bad as the high school job that I left. It's my social skills , or lack thereof. It's the way colleagues (especially supervisors) run over me and get me to do their work. It's many things. Too many. All I wanted to...

Insecurity is the greatest challenge for me in relationships. I seldom feel confident as a partner, friend, mentor, or coworker. In my marriage, I rarely believe I am as intelligent overall as my wife. I know I am not as emotionally balanced as she is. I know I lack her ability to deal with people. I know all the ways in which I fall short of her. I rarely feel that my talents complement hers. This insecurity means I constantly worry that I have failed her. She could have found a better companion, someone with whom she would enjoy life and enjoy more success. That's a challenge for a relationship, since I'm always fighting the sense that she would be better off without me. I think to myself, if only I were more successful, more popular, more charming, and more fun, her life would be better. Instead, she's stuck with me holding her back financially and socially. Similar thoughts impede my friendships, my teaching, and my career. Doubts take over, consuming m...

Cinemeccanica movie projector from circa 1950 in small cinema of folklore and arts union. (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) Since January 2016, I have been working towards my MFA in Film and Digital Technology . During these 18 months, I have had a number of medical issues, yet I did complete my coursework on time despite hospital visits, surgeries, and other minor disasters, including a car accident that totaled our beloved Jeep Cherokee. What I don’t blog about, for many reasons, is that my wife and I are also foster parents . I won’t write much about that, but want people to understand that not only am I “the autistic me” trying to do my best to obtain job skills, I am also a parent with special needs children who are worth every minute they require for special services and our love. My studies, teaching, our medical adventures, the children… it all adds up and has made completing the MFA film project a race against the clock. It also is going to require more funds than I had an...

Specimen of the typeface Comic Sans. (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) Personally, I support everyone being able to type and read in whatever typefaces individuals prefer. If you like Comic Sans , then change the font while you type or read online content. If you like Helvetica , use that. The digital world is not print. You can change typefaces. You can change their sizes. You can change colors. There is no reason to argue over what you use to type or to read as long as I can use typefaces that I like. Now, as a design researcher? I'll tell you that type matters a lot to both the biological act of reading and the psychological act of constructing meaning. Statistically, there are "better" and "worse" type for conveying messages. There are also typefaces that are more legible and more readable. Sometimes, legibility does not help readability, either, as a type with overly distinct letters (legibility) can hinder word shapes and decoding (readability). ...