Skip to main content

Struggling Even Now

Even as an adult in my mid-30s, I am struggling as a graduate student. I can do the work, I can read the texts, but I am struggling. What is the issue? Probably the most important of all:

In eight months I have yet to form a single personal connection within my doctoral program.

My social anxiety is too high to attend gatherings. I keep thinking I'm going to attend an event, but I have only managed to attend a play -- nothing else outside of classes. I fear going to campus, much of the time. It takes a lot of energy to attend class. Sadly, I sit and shake in my classes, even though I don't hesitate to speak.

Classmates have called me "The Ghost" to my face. I'm an outsider.

The importance of connections cannot be overstated. You need to connect with classmates and with instructors.

I would tell any student that you need a mentor in a degree program. Without a mentor and a clear goal, you will struggle -- as I am doing now. A mentor helps you navigate everything from course selection to career objectives. I cannot praise the mentors from my past enough.

As a student, you need to work well with the others in your program. During school, these individuals can tell you about instructors and campus life. Your fellow students might become professional contacts, also.

In my case, I find I have neither form of connection at this moment. I have not socialized with a single student in my doctoral program. My colleagues don't know me and I don't really know them, beyond the facts I have overheard. I simply occupy a seat during courses.

Professors are lecturers, and I know they are to be respected. I wish I knew them a bit better, but I am too uncomfortable approaching them.

Clearly, I need to take action.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Autistic Burnout

Summer demands a lot of social energy, especially for parents. For autistics, the never-ending social calendar of summer can cause serious autistic burnout. Host C. S. Wyatt discusses his need to find a balance between social demands and self-care. Check out this episode!

ABA and NARTH

There must be something better out there. I'm not sure what, but the more I interview functional adults with autism who received ABA-based or similar therapies, the more I know there must be a better approach. The problem is, I have no idea what that "better approach" is. I'm not a psychologist. I'm a language arts and autism specialist. My research is on how autistic students learn to master written communication (which doesn't really mean "written" in all cases). I am not a therapist. I am not a counselor. But there has to be a better way to help students and young children. I am not suggesting all ABA-based therapies in use today are bad. I sincerely believe ABA must be revised, researched, and ideally all connections to anything Lovaas did forgotten to history. I'd even like to see whatever evolution occurs to have a name other than "ABA-based therapy." The history and associations are that troubling. So, understand I'm ca...

Kumar and Amit Ramlall

Recorded 13 October 2023 The Chintan Project empowers businesses to discover their larger purpose, draw strength from the challenges they face, and leverage their unique offering to impact the world. https://www.chintanproject.com Amit Chintan Ramlall, Autistic Polymath and Consultant Dr. Kumar Ramlall, Medical Doctor and Father of Amit Pratima Ramlall, Ph.D., Scientist and Mother of Amit Pratima and Kumar decided to name their son: “Amit” meaning Infinite in Sanskrit, and “Chintan” meaning Thinking. Dr. Kumar Ramlall, CEO and Co-Founder Chintan Project “The Human Behavior Advisors” The Autistic Me: Blog:  https://www.tameri.com/autisticme/ Podcast:  https://autisticme.libsyn.com/neurodiversity Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/autisticme/ Twitter:  https://twitter.com/autisticme YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/c/CSWyatt LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/autisticme   Check out this episode!