Skip to main content

Feeling Powerless

My wife had an outpatient procedure March 1, and I hated every minute of it.

I know it has never been easy for my parents or my wife when I've had my little medical misadventures, but it stinks to have to be the one in the waiting room.

Sure, it was "no big deal" in the end. Her doctor told me things had never gone so smoothly; my wife is in great shape and the procedure took mere minutes.

The "mere minutes" in the operating room left me waiting for two hours. I walked the corridors, visited the hospital gift shop, the coffee shop, and the diner. The hospital diner was nice, with a counter and round stools like you might find in any 1950s malt shop.

Every surgery is major. Anesthesia is dangerous. Surgery is dangerous.

When it is me, I don't worry as much as I did when my wife was in the operating room.

If something happened to me, I know she'd be okay. Her family and my family would see to that. But, if anything ever happened to her, I'd be crushed. She makes me a much better person. She helps me navigate the world, especially when I'm overwhelmed by everything around me. She doesn't need me nearly as much as I need her.

Yes, it is selfish, but the world is also a better place with her in it.

I'm still a bit tense; I've rarely felt so powerless as when she was in surgery. I'm glad she handled the surgery well. She was fine only hours later.

Comments

  1. I'm glad she is okay and sorry for the distress you experienced while waiting.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I can identify with that feeling of helplessness. One of the side effects of love. She sounds like a wonderful woman and a spouse worth experiencing anxiety attacks for. Glad all is well. Great post.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are so blessed to have a loving supportive family.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It is tough when our loved ones have surgery.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I am fortunate to have my wife. I'm exhausting and frustrating; I know that.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Comments violating the policies of this blog will not be approved for posting. Language and content should be appropriate for all readers and maintain a polite tone. Thank you.

Popular posts from this blog

Autistic Burnout

Summer demands a lot of social energy, especially for parents. For autistics, the never-ending social calendar of summer can cause serious autistic burnout. Host C. S. Wyatt discusses his need to find a balance between social demands and self-care. Check out this episode!

Autism, Asperger's, and IQ

"Aren't people with Asperger's more likely to be geniuses? Isn't genius related to autism?" A university student asked this in a course I am teaching. The class discussion was covering neurological differences, free will, and the nature versus nurture debate. The textbook for the course includes sidebars on the brain and behavior throughout chapters on ethics and morality. This student was asking a question reflecting media portrayals of autism spectrum disorders, social skills difficulties, and genius. I did not address this question from a personal perspective in class, but I have when speaking to groups of parents, educators, and caregivers. Some of the reasons these questions arise, as mentioned above, are media portrayals and news coverage of autism. Examples include: Television shows with gifted characters either identified with or assumed to have autistic traits: Alphas, Big Bang Theory, Bones, Rizzoli and Isles, Touch, and others. Some would include...

Alex Plank and Jenny Palmiotto discuss "An Eventing with Ezra"

The film Ezra follows Max Bernal (Bobby Cannavale), a stand-up comedian living with his father (Robert De Niro), while struggling to co-parent his autistic son Ezra (introducing William Fitzgerald) with his ex-wife (Rose Byrne). Alex Plank, Associate Producer Alex Plank is a trailblazing autistic self-advocate and a pioneering leader in the autistic human rights. As an associate producer of the critically acclaimed movie 'Ezra,' Alex has made significant strides in both behind-the-scenes and on-camera roles. He is a champion of authentic and humanistic representation of autistic individuals in the film industry. With a deep commitment to challenging ableism, Alex advocates for a world where autistic people are valued and respected. This commitment extends to a broader condemnation of ableism in all its forms, with a specific focus on dismantling the barriers within the film industry that marginalize autistic talent and narratives. Jenny Palmiotto – Founder of Love & Aut...