Love (and Sex): Blog Topics People Want

English: Love question (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Visitors have asked why the blog doesn't deal more with personal issues like romance, marriage, children. There's not much to "teach" other people. My advice to autistics is to stop trying to please everyone else and find your own social network. In that social network, you might (or might not) find friendships and love.

If you don't have friends, you definitely won't find love. I am a believer in friendships helping us cope with life.

Before I removed the Q&A section on the blog site, the majority of questions I received were about relationships / dating. Basically, "How can my son / daughter have a 'normal' social life and find love?"

I tired of the question because 1) there is no one answer and 2) many of the autistics corresponding with me hated the pressure to find "love" and didn't want parental help with romance!

Though I have a short ebook available on the topic of relationships, I lost enthusiasm for the project because so many questions were about sex and love. There are plenty of online and in-print guides to the technical aspects of sex and any guide to love will be flawed.

I do plan to update the relationship guide during 2017, but with more on social skills and more autism-specific research citations.

But, parents, please remember what you want and need is not what your child might want or need. It is not "empathy" if all you are doing is overlaying your emotional system onto other people.

Dating isn't easy for anyone. There are no simple answers to how people meet (work, school, social clubs, online) and fewer answers on how to date successfully. As for love... forcing it is probably the only wrong solution out there.

What should a blog or podcast address? I'm not sure. But, apparently if I want traffic and sponsors, sex sells. It might get more views, but would I be helping anyone?

Use the Facebook Page if you want to suggest topics and ask questions.

https://www.facebook.com/autisticme/

Also, a reminder that plans for a podcast will take additional resources. Please consider sponsoring The Autistic Me if you'd like more blogging and a podcast.

https://www.paypal.me/poetcsw

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There must be something better out there. I'm not sure what, but the more I interview functional adults with autism who received ABA-based or similar therapies, the more I know there must be a better approach. The problem is, I have no idea what that "better approach" is. I'm not a psychologist. I'm a language arts and autism specialist. My research is on how autistic students learn to master written communication (which doesn't really mean "written" in all cases). I am not a therapist. I am not a counselor. But there has to be a better way to help students and young children. I am not suggesting all ABA-based therapies in use today are bad. I sincerely believe ABA must be revised, researched, and ideally all connections to anything Lovaas did forgotten to history. I'd even like to see whatever evolution occurs to have a name other than "ABA-based therapy." The history and associations are that troubling. So, understand I'm ca...

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I joined Twitter on the first day of 2011 ( @autisticme ). I also joined a Twibe (seriously?) and registered with WeFollow.com to learn more about what autism-related Twitter feeds might exist. Within a few days, I was already observing a familiar debate. In fact, it the debate I described in the single most-viewed blog entry of The Autistic Me, which dates back to 2008 (see " Logos, Symbols, and Ribbons "). Various "Aspie Advocates" are still protesting the puzzle piece. I'm sure they will be protesting the puzzle piece next year, in five years, and a decade from now. The "neurodiverstiy" (ND) movement doesn't like the puzzle piece. (Everyone's brain is different: neurological diversity is a fact of life.) Honestly, I don't care for the puzzle piece either. I've written and said that I find it personally off-putting. If I am a puzzle, I'm not more or less of a puzzle than most human beings. I'm told, "Oh, no, it is autism ...

Full Spectrum MamaJanuary 31, 2017 at 12:25 PM
Great points - for any person or parent!!

We are ALL unique.

Thanks and love,
Full Spectrum Mama
UnknownApril 8, 2017 at 3:05 PM
I have a head injury, too -
I pretty much comprehend what
the silent, verbal abuse and pride
of not wanting to have anything
to do with your austism.
C'est la vie.
Some people shall make
Seventh-Heaven
while some wont.
All the attitudes of humanity

trustNjesusALWAYS, dear.
God bless your indelible soul.
Meet me Upstairs for
a Big-Ol beer and we'll
tok bout celebrating our
eternal resurrection
at the RongWayPub
(that's a bar for
the paraiah's of society
who, despite all the odds,
made it to Seventh-Heaven).

Cya soon...

The Autistic Me

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